To you daddy:
I have been thinking, this have being the most difficult summer I had in years. Why? So many things come to my mind.
I lost my job when I least expected it. I was a victim of injustice, and even that I realized that injustice is everywhere, I managed myself to forgive the pastor that did this to me. I have prayed so much to my Sweet, Sweet Jesus, to give me the strength to go on. To still believe that there are good people that wants to see you happy. And that there are people that wishes you well.
I have to believe in humanity, I have to believe that all this called life is worth it and that all our experiences in this test called life are for something bigger, that I can’t imagine but that I will understand someday.
Today I was watching a movie called “Trust”. And it affected me more than I thought it would. It’s about this perfect family and how something happened that put that family to a great test. I saw my daughters in that movie. And how in the past I wasn’t exactly there for them the way they needed me to, and the way I was supposed to. I was a single mom, with four children. I was still young and my husband left…just like that. He fell in love with another woman and I just didn’t understand why?
So; suddenly from being a married young woman with four children I was all alone and in shock. I did not know what to do then and if what I did was the right thing. I love my children even though they do not reciprocrate the feeling as I expected. I wish they know how much I love them just as they are.
I see my family as my first congregation with different characters as they come.
I see my family as my first congregation with different characters as they come.
Thinking back, what held me together, was GOD, my faith in Him, and that my beautiful father talked to me about HIM and that miracles were possible in this time, and that my miracle was coming soon. He also talked to Jesus about me.
I still remember the day that he died, that Saturday, December 4, 2004. At 6:00 pm exactly, I was able to close his beautiful blue eyes. And I knew, yes I knew that he was going to take care of my miracle, because he was going to speak to JESUS in Heaven. And he will ask HIM personally to take care of me and my miracle will become true. And it did.
I am going to be a Pastor and I will be able to speak about my sweet JESUS to everyone that wants to meet HIM. And thank's to HIM I am able to forgive myself and all the people that have done me wrong all my life. But in special some pastors and church people that tried to knock me out. God gives us the power to do that. To forgive, to love, and to be as thruthfull as you can be. Just trusting GOD.
I thank you my LORD and you daddy. I know you are watching for me and my children and grandchildren.
So I guess that the beautiful song titled “I Can Only Imagine”, that narrates that wonderful moment of going home to my JESUS will be like… you daddy already know that. Just one thing daddy, please when my time comes, please promise that you will be there to help me decide what I can only imagine.
I love you daddy and I miss you so much.


